Author Topic: How to spot and avoid a gold digger in Ukraine for NEWBIES .....  (Read 1517 times)

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Online Tnic

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I don't understand why so many guys/men fall for golddiggers.

They let the little head control things.
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Offline Vitaliy50

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I don't understand why so many guys/men fall for golddiggers. Is it the fake lips and the big titties? My fiancee is stunning without make up (she never wears any).
Just look for humble and sincere women, it's not that difficult if you know where to look.

You are so correct. Ukraine has the most beautiful, humble, sweet women in the whole world. And it's so easy to find them. If some foreigner doesn't feel like learning about Ukrainian mentality, language, culture and at least a few words in Russian - I won't be surprised if he latches on to a gold digger. And I can't see this ending well.

People that come to Ukraine and expect to date must first adapt to Ukraine. Get over the culture shock. Understand the life here - only then will they be mentally and emotionally prepared to engage with a Ukrainian woman.

I've been here for 4 years and had numerous relationships.. I was even thinking of starting a good Youtube channel about golddigging women / general "avoid-foreigner-scams in Ukraine" channel. It's sure to get popular.

I think Reggie should do it - if you are not camera shy that is. Websites are so last decade.....
« Last Edit: 19:29 14-Jan-2018 by Vitaliy50 »

Online Tnic

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I don't understand why so many guys/men fall for golddiggers. Is it the fake lips and the big titties? My fiancee is stunning without make up (she never wears any).
Just look for humble and sincere women, it's not that difficult if you know where to look.
I've been here for 4 years and had numerous relationships.. I was even thinking of starting a good Youtube channel about golddigging women / general "avoid-foreigner-scams in Ukraine" channel. It's sure to get popular.

I think Reggie should do it - if you are not camera shy that is. Websites are so last decade.....

NO NO NO!  Reggie has a face made for radio and a voice designed for pre-talkies movies.
Recent science has shown that saliva causes cancer, but only swallowed in small amounts over a long period of time.

Offline Reggie

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I think Reggie should do it - if you are not camera shy that is. Websites are so last decade.....

Vitali, Thanks for saying I should do it.

I've thought about it:  Here are the things that have held me back.

1 - maybe a girl is bag of trash, but she turns her life around; should I condemn her for life on the internet?
 
2 - maybe exposing someone like this ends up hurting their children or their husband.

There are issues involved, obviously.

A webpage allows people to read and see what the girls wrote and make up their minds.

By the way: I couldn't disagree more with these parts of your comments; I think maybe because your comment didn't translate well into English: "People that come to Ukraine and expect to date here must first adapt to Ukraine."

I think (I hope) you meant to say, "must fully understand the pitfalls of Ukrainian dating and learn to avoid them."

Because adopting (accepting) Ukrainian dating mentality would mean having 6 different kids by 6 different guys; having a VK site to attract new lovers and keep your old ones dangling around; and so on.   It's not one of the better parts of Ukrainian culture (for me) - just my opinion, not God's law.

Because those 2 girls I put on the previous page: they were smart, charming, good talkers, had good jobs, were nice to look at and they would have jacked up almost any man without the hint of a warning.  You would never even see it coming with them.

Certainly, I don't say all women here are like this; there are good ones here too.   But those  bad ones are here; and they are here in big numbers. 

If I made a youtube vlog about this subject, I'm sure my wife would kill me.  So, it's website or bust.  I'm definitely thinking about it: At best it would be 'the Ukrainian dating world according to Reggie,' which means that it would have it's fair share of insanity and humor, and piss off everyone, while giving everyone a good laugh.  I'll think about it. :D :D :D :D 
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Offline Vitaliy50

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I think Reggie should do it - if you are not camera shy that is. Websites are so last decade.....

Vitali, Thanks for saying I should do it.

I've thought about it:  Here are the things that have held me back.

1 - maybe a girl is bag of trash, but she turns her life around; should I condemn her for life on the internet?
 
2 - maybe exposing someone like this ends up hurting their children or their husband.

There are issues involved, obviously.

A webpage allows people to read and see what the girls wrote and make up their minds.

By the way: I couldn't disagree more with these parts of your comments; I think maybe because your comment didn't translate well into English: "People that come to Ukraine and expect to date here must first adapt to Ukraine."

I think (I hope) you meant to say, "must fully understand the pitfalls of Ukrainian dating and learn to avoid them."

Because adopting (accepting) Ukrainian dating mentality would mean having 6 different kids by 6 different guys; having a VK site to attract new lovers and keep your old ones dangling around; and so on.   It's not one of the better parts of Ukrainian culture (for me) - just my opinion, not God's law.

Because those 2 girls I put on the previous page: they were smart, charming, good talkers, had good jobs, were nice to look at and they would have jacked up almost any man without the hint of a warning.  You would never even see it coming with them.

Certainly, I don't say all women here are like this; there are good ones here too.   But those  bad ones are here; and they are here in big numbers. 

If I made a youtube vlog about this subject, I'm sure my wife would kill me.  So, it's website or bust.  I'm definitely thinking about it: At best it would be 'the Ukrainian dating world according to Reggie,' which means that it would have it's fair share of insanity and humor, and piss off everyone, while giving everyone a good laugh.  I'll think about it. :D :D :D :D

You could keep the women anonymous. But describe their personalities, behaivors, stories... In ether case you would provide value to your Youtube audience. I am actually planning on doing a channel, but I need to really compile content.

And for the second part, no - I precisely mean adapt to Ukraine. If you want to understand a Ukrainian woman and spend your life with her, understanding how life works in Ukraine can help you better understand her point of view. Besides, it can help you develop a more worldly view. Wouldn't hurt.. As most Westerners are too inward-looking)
« Last Edit: 19:37 14-Jan-2018 by Vitaliy50 »

Offline Reggie

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NO NO NO!  Reggie has a face made for radio and a voice designed for pre-talkies movies.

So true.

And my wife would cut my penis off in my sleep if I made a Youtube video titled "Gold Diggers in Ukraine - My Expert Knowledge, by Reggie Harvey."

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Offline Reggie

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And for the second part, no - I precisely mean adapt to Ukraine. If you want to understand a Ukrainian woman and spend your life with her, understanding how life works in Ukraine can help you better understand her point of view. Besides, it can help you develop a more worldly view. Wouldn't hurt.. As most Westerners are too inward-looking)

It's just my opinion, but 'understanding Ukrainian mentality' to help dating success is exactly what gets men into trouble in my humble opinion.   What you mean is to accept and conform to their general mentality. 

That's just like letting the problems in through the back door.  See the photo below: I'd never accept the type of mentality in the photo. And that type of thinking is common in Ukraine.

I think a better way is to understand the Ukrainian mentality for purposes of avoiding it to find your diamond in the heap of dirt.

See, I told you.  If I did a website on the topic, I would be brutally honest. 

« Last Edit: 20:22 14-Jan-2018 by Reggie »
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Offline Vitaliy50

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And for the second part, no - I precisely mean adapt to Ukraine. If you want to understand a Ukrainian woman and spend your life with her, understanding how life works in Ukraine can help you better understand her point of view. Besides, it can help you develop a more worldly view. Wouldn't hurt.. As most Westerners are too inward-looking)

It's just my opinion, but 'understanding Ukrainian mentality' to help dating success is exactly what gets men into trouble in my humble opinion. What you mean is to accept and conform to their general mentality. 

That's just like letting the problems in through the back door.  See the photo below: I'd never accept the type of mentality in the photo. And that type of thinking is common in Ukraine.

I think a better way is to understand the Ukrainian mentality for purposes of avoiding it to find your diamond in the heap of dirt.

See, I told you.  If I did a website on the topic, I would be brutally honest.

I see nothing wrong with these comments. They are similar to what any women out there could say, anywhere. In fact, I find women who talk like that are just looking for a dominant guy. The right guy could still get into these women's pants and even put them in their place. Some women on dating sites could be there to flirt or to chat - they may not be serious. This is their way of being defensive and weed people out. If you don't like that, don't talk to them..

I don't mean conform to the "Ukrainian Village / Gopnik mentality". Dear God no.

We are generalizing here, but I lived in Montreal (a French city in Canada) in my early 20s, which prepared me for Ukraine. I don't know a word of French, but I noticed that being nice, curious about their culture and using "Bonjour" and "Merci" made people open up to me. Have a positive attitude, don't treat Ukrainian women like Westeners, but also be curious about how Ukraine works. I find it's a great conversation starter...

I've had amazing dates with amazing women and not a single bad experience. When a woman doesn't return your calls or acts cold, move on. There's no shortage of great ladies in this country...
« Last Edit: 10:57 15-Jan-2018 by Vitaliy50 »

Offline youngken

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... they would tell you about their string of divorces and husband number 5 or 6.   Pretty much like a badger in heels  that had been sniffing glue.  Pure trash.
How old were they? ;D

Offline youngken

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... ie Iphone 7 plus or an Armani watch then she is a material whore who will take advantage of you financially
I seldom saw Ukrainian lady wearing luxury jewellery / bag on the street. Even the man gave her and these things might be gone to pawn shop. :-[

Offline Reggie

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.  The right guy could still get into these women's pants

My comments are focussed on the qualities that make a good family woman, not about getting into someone's pants.

I see nothing wrong with these comments.

If a lady labels herself as a "bitch," says she 'will not cook or clean,' considers a 'good man' as someone that obeys her without question, that type of lady will find it difficult in a family life.   

That's not a family woman; she doesn't have the right outlook for a family situation.   In fact, it's a recipe for stress and disaster later on.

. This is their way of being defensive and weed people out.

Of course, if a woman says she will not cook or clean, expects a man to submit unconditionally to all of her demands, and says has irrational psychotic outbursts, that will deter most family-minded men.

The way to weed people out is to not talk to them, if that is a lady's intention. 

See, I don't make excuses for counterproductive games; if a man starts doing that, he will see more of these games later on down the road as the relationship progresses.  It will just get worse.


Bottom Line:

I agree that learning Ukrainian (the language) gives useful insight and can be useful for socializing. 
That's fine; but that's not what we are talking about.    We are talking about the mindset for choosing a family-oriented woman.

I totally disagree that foreigners should conform to the prevalent Ukrainian-female-relationship-mentality.  Why should they?  A lot of it is horrid.  It has little to nothing to do with establishing a family life (unless one wants to be a gimp, a sucker and a wallet only in that family).  To be fair, these days there are a lot of men that enjoy being a human-pin-cushion. 

In fact, I think these issues are why a lot of men turn to alcohol abuse in Ukraine; and one of the reasons Ukraine has a shrinking population; and disappearing family structure.     

I think it's better to find a woman that is willing to adapt to the generally accepted family mindset; and that type of woman will be more difficult to find.

I respect you; but I don't think the way you are approaching it correctly, 'finds the good ladies for a family life.' 

It's a tricky process, obviously, but knowing what to look for is key.

Still our discussion is a useful discussion, because I think it shows why people run into trouble in this process.

« Last Edit: 14:35 15-Jan-2018 by Reggie »
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Offline frank1010

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The cultural difference and the education of the female population should also be taken into consideration. In western Europe women have fought for their rights and equality for decades until they got  what they wanted (job, salaries, etc) . Result is that we treat women equal including the expectation that they should contribute to the household. In almost all former Soviet republics girls (and boys)  were brought up completely different. Girls expect that the man pays for everything and men know their duties. In western Europe it is very common that the bill is split on a date, in Ukraine an absolute nogo. I remember my former girlfriend from moscow. She had a phenomenal  salary working for a multinational company, I used to spend lavish amounty of money for vacation but asked her to buy the airtickets herself... She always complained about this and said I am not taking my responsibilities.... So its not  always gold digging but sometimes a matter of the education and upbringing.

Offline sosednik

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2nd attempt (I tried to post before, but it got lost somehow) ...

A little discussion was made above of the differences (if any) between Ukrainian and Russian women, with regard to "gold digging".

I suggest that this type of behavior is strongly related to poverty.  Ukraine is a very poor country, comparable (in nominal per-capita GDP) to Sudan, Nigeria, and Laos.

For every dollar of economic output generated by the average Ukrainian, the average Russian generates about $4 (and the average American about $25).  So, if a greater proportion of Ukrainian women are making these kinds of antics as compared to Russians, it may well be about the money.

That being said, in my many visits to both countries, including a good number of meetings with women initially contacted via dating websites, I didn't see a significant difference in the proportion (mercifully small) of women looking for a man to spend a lot of cash on them.

PS  The categories of women seeking largesse, and women seeking husbands, are not necessarily exclusive.  I rather suspect that some of the "shopping girls" are willing to behave much better with men they're actually interested in.

Offline Reggie

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I suggest that this type of behavior is strongly related to poverty.

What do you mean by "this behavior"?  Gold digging?   

Rich countries have gold diggers also; there's no shortage of them.

Poverty can't be the only factor or even the main factor. 

What necessarily must be a part of gold digging, and that men don't like to admit, is that the women that do this view men as lesser beings.

I think family upbringing is the #1 factor.   

You were a poor student, like everyone else, at some point in your life, right?  You didn't become a gigolo or beat up nuns in the street to steal their money; why?   It's because you were raised right.

There are plenty of poor people living honorable and honest lives, and there is no shortage of gold diggers in the wealthiest neighborhoods in America.

I rather suspect that some of the "shopping girls" are willing to behave much better with men they're actually interested in.

I understand what you are trying to say here; but let's really think about it.  If a girl uses one 'sugar daddy' to buy her shoes, and another man to buy her iPhone, and she has a real boyfriend that she helps with household chores, who is she really being good to?   

None of them.

 
« Last Edit: 09:09 16-Jan-2018 by Reggie »
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Online K24

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It is probably not really one factor only, but the coming together of various things at the same time. 

1) Poverty - but this cannot be the only reason as there are also gold diggers in rich countries and as there are also similarly poor countries with much less gold diggers

2) Social acceptability - culture of women not paying for anything

3) "Market conditions" - enough foreign men hunting for Ukrainian women (including tons from Turkey and Arab countries which do not really seem to be much represented on this forum here) so that there is very little penalty for gold digging